Laura Novak
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Girls On The Bus

7/5/2011

 
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Welcome back to Girls On The Bus, a series of short, but shrewd, analyses of Mrs. Todd Palin on her latest narcissist odyssey. Or movie madness trip. Or just-get-me-the-hell-away-from-home-tour.

My partner in satirical and boldly biased analysis is wonder woman writer, feminist, and managing editor and columnist for Politicususa, Sarah Jones. 

LN:  Sarah, the media now speculates and opines that the wheels have come off the Palin Family Circus bus. But Mrs. Palin tweets and shames the opinionators with her sarcasm, so then we wait and the thread changes:  will she/won’t she? Is messing with media’s collective minds the only power the quitter-twitter yields at this point?

SJ: It’s probably foolish to try to predict what an irrational, erratic person will do, but I think we can say with all certainity that Palin loves to be the center of attention and she’s been brilliant at manipulating the press to get that attention. The problem she faces is that if she does not announce, no one will care about her anymore. She thinks she is a celebrity, but she is not a celebrity even of Paris Hilton style. The only reason she ever got press was because of her potential impact on politics. She and her family are obviously striving to be the Kardashians, famous for being famous. I just don’t think any of them has the star power to pull that off for very long – though I should temper that by noting that the American public loves to hate reality TV stars, and the Palins certainly fall into that category.

They are catnip to the media, whose driving need is to push drama and conflict as “reality tv”. They like that people hate the Palins, because hate sells. That is not, however,  sustainable star power. Indifference, on the other hand, does not sell and that is the road Sarah Palin is facing. Imagine if she came out with a perfume line (e.g., Pole Dancin’ 4 Jesus Eau d’toilette, Fire In My Belly Man Magnet Fertility Spray, Cojones for Real Women in a Bottle, Wee-Wee’d Up with LameStream Pump, Feed My Hungry Market, Put  a Finger in the Dyke Snake Oil, Love Your Country Kick Out the Browns, Lovin’ Real America Repellant Spray, That’s My Money in Your Pocket Love Spray…..I’m sure your readers can come up with more suggestions.)  That’s a path to prosperity that I could support.

LN:  While Mrs. Palin was literally and figuratively filling her tank in Alaska, or Arizona, or where ever, the GOP trotted out their newest “false eyelashes and five kids” candidate: Michele Bachmann. Although I might take to calling her Mickey because, well, it’s just not real, is it? I mean, are we supposed to take this seriously?

SJ: I like that!  Sadly, I think we are supposed to take this seriously, which just demonstrates how low the Republican Party has gone. You can only pander to the nuts for so long before they demand a nut for President. I don’t think Bachmann could win the Presidency, but what kind of damage is her candidacy inflicting on this country in the world’s view? And here, every time she parrots her Oral Roberts revised history on national TV, our nations’ collective intelligence sags under the weight of mob ignorance.

LN:  Matt Taibbi pretty much lances the wound that is the Right-wing, Republican, and fecund beauty queen-turned-party babe in this article in Rolling Stone.  No kidding. I had to keep referring to the title to remind myself that it was Mickey B. he was writing about, not Sarah P.

SJ: Under the hood, the two are very similar. They share the same religious zealotry, the same blind following of the corporate agenda, the same pandering to the fundamentalists, and they are both being used as a pretty face to market damaging policies. This was a long term goal of the Republican Party – years ago, they made a huge push to run women at local levels to get them primed for a national audience- because it’s all about the exterior. Put a cowboy in front of the corporate carpetbaggers and the people swoon as they bend over.

LN:  Ooh, hurt me. Elsewhere on their site, Julian Brookes gives Rolling Stone readers this quiz.  I actually fared quite well because I do think there is a scintilla of sanity to Bachmann. And I was able to differentiate between the two women. Do you think that’s the whole idea:  drive us all mad so that we can’t really see what the puppet masters are up to behind Curtain Number One?

SJ: Is the tail wagging the dog? They’ve set themselves up for this and even the party elite know this isn’t going to win a national election, but to some extent they can’t stop using the crack because the hit is so instantaneous when they do. Boom! Got voters. But not enough….

Sarah Jones, it’s always my pleasure to ride this bus with you and get a spritz of your humor and political insight. You are always an island of sanity in this political landscape filled with crazy potholes.


Barbara Alfaro link
7/5/2011 12:25:28 am

A great post! Thank you Laura -- and thank you Sarah Jones. It's reassuring to know feminist thought, healthly anger, and plain old fashioned wit are still alive and well in your writing. Laura, thanks too for posting the link to "Sarah Palin and Michele Bachman Give Birth to Hooters Democracy," where the phrase "putting a pretty face on ugly ideas" says much.

bus blinds link
8/2/2012 04:39:54 pm

The blog is really interesting to read.Thanks a lot for the blog post to read.Thanks a lot for sharing.

viola-alex
7/5/2011 12:46:27 am

I'm enough of a conspiracy theorist that I sometimes fear that Mickey B and Sairy P are just circus acts to keep us sidetracked from something far more evil in the works.

Or that the Republican establishment has fared so well under a Democratic president (unregulated banking and finance, ironclad tax loopholes, oil/gas privledges etc) that the WH seems an unnecessary bother. Why not abandon the party to the nuts for the next election? Mickey B can be the sacrificial lamb, for sloughing off the power of Religious Right, so a new force can emerge in 2016, should we make it that far.



Brad Scharlott
7/5/2011 01:37:59 am

You are such a witty writer and fine stylist that I stole a line from you without realizing it, then in revising saw what I had done and changed it. So if I ever seem to plagiarize you in the future it's unintentional and it's due to the fact that your prose is so vivid and memorable that it stick in the mind and becomes part of the way one views the world.

Brad Scharlott
7/5/2011 01:41:06 am

Oh, the above was meant for Sarah Jones, but it could just as easily apply to Laura. I have already tried to make my prose more Laura-like, but her voice is unique.

V link
7/5/2011 02:39:38 am

Hello, Laura and Sarah - the dynamic duo! Like Brad, I very much enjoy your wit.

Thanks for the link to the Rolling Stone article. I agree that Palin's star is probably fading - although we should continue to monitor, there are far greater threats on the horizon (and one of them is MSM fail - fortunately we have Brad, and Sarah, and Laura, and litbrit, and Lidia and many others - all pursuing the truth).

Sarah Jones link
7/5/2011 04:02:34 am

Brad, I'm truly honored. I'm not one of those people who thinks I own the English language, so I don't often find myself thinking, "Hey, didn't I write that?" I'm usually just honored to be read and even more pleased that my words mattered to someone. That said, it's very noble and ethical of you to try to attribute, and I am sure that every writer appreciates it as I do.

I concur re Laura - she is a witty and brilliant journalist.

Barbara, it's a pleasure to be read by people who get it. We need to take back ownership of the political dialogue as it impacts issues of feminism (egalitarianism, equal rights for all, dignity for the poor, etc).

Viola, you are correct - esp to the extent that every candidate the GOP has run since Nixon has been a distraction from the real evils going on. They are puppets, but now the puppets are running the Tea Party show. In truth, most political candidates are puppets and many of these folks just aren't very bright. It's stunning to realize just how limited some of our representatives' brains are. And then we get Hillary, Franken, Obama and others, who demonstrate that with the right temperament, a smart person can actually work well even within this system. The media's obsession with them comes from news no longer being a loss leader, but having to make a profit. It's become entertainment, not news. The news isn't reporting on the real issues because the real issues don't capture our attention and drive ratings sky high. That isn't part of a sinister plot (though it creates a sinister reality), just more proof that doing everything for PROFIT is not good for democracy. But the actuality of it does create the perfect environment for the carpetbagging corporatists to rob us blind and they are taking full advantage of that. We are partially to blame here for not resisting the cultural pull toward blind consumerism ushered in most ungraciously by W as the answer to a national crisis.

V- Thank you, it's always a pleasure to talk with Laura.

Keep up the great work, all of you:-)

FrostyAK
7/5/2011 04:20:13 am

Six of one, half dozen of the other. I agree with viola-alex, they are nothing but a distraction. But a distraction for exactly what?

So, it seems we are now being spared from the Wasilla Godzilla, and being presented with the Minnesota Masquerader? For what exact purpose? To desensitize the population to having crazy Xtian loons running for high office. Are the schools really putting out such non-thinkers, that they can be mesmerized by such paltry glitter?

Has anyone checked out Bachmann's claim to 23 foster children? I read somewhere (don't ask... can't remember) that she did in fact take in 23 teens over a period of time. All or the majority were pregnant, and Bachmann kept them only long enough for them to deliver.

Sinclair Lewis: “When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross.” Is the population at large blind to what is happening?

elizabeth
7/5/2011 04:33:25 am

I have two beautiful, intelligent, lovely daughters. They are named Sarah -with an 'h' :) and Laura.

Of so many things Sarah Palin has soiled for women my daughter's name was a minor one in the big picture, but gosh it's nice to have a Sarah bring back honor, decency and respect to a great name.

Sarah's article in Politiusa the other day ( http://www.politicususa.com/en/michele-bachmann-sarah-palin-hooters) is IMHO one of the finest articles I have read to date that articulates so intelligently exactly what it is about the Sarah Palins and MIchele Bachmanns that just angers and saddens so many of us who have spent our lives fighting for womens' rights, have hit the glass ceiling time and again and have worked hard our whole lives to raise decent, compassionate sons and daughters who know their worth is not about their surface, shallow appearance, but what they are inside.

Thank you Sarah and Laura.

Laura Novak link
7/5/2011 04:50:41 am

Thank you Elizabeth for telling us that. I imagine a lot of people have felt their name soiled by this woman's public image and presence. So glad we have Sarah Jones to imbue it with integrity and intelligence again.

Thank you Sarah for checking in with commenters and leaving even more brilliant comments in your wake. I love riding the bus with you!

You are all right in that it's like watching a shell game to try to figure out where the token is hidden. But the house always wins with gambles like this. We must try to not let them use these "false eyelashes and five kids" candidates as if they were the Manchurian mamas.

lilly lily
7/5/2011 05:07:51 am

It isn't only the Name Sarah that seems to have been diminished in honor, it is everything Sarah Pali touches.

I call it "The Sarah Palin Touch of TRASH". Like the Midas touch it does nothing but cause trouble.

At Wonkette, Mercede Johnstone's defense of her brother comes up for trashing.

While I'm not a fan of Mercede, I do credit that she is trying to help her brother, so I'll give her brownie points for that.

She does care about Levi, and if he is lieing low and doesn't defend himself??

Why not release his book with a defense for himself instead of letting his sister do it.

Initially he had Palin down on the mat, with the article in Vanity Fair, then it all went downhill with poor representation by Tank and his lawyer.

They certainly have done him no favors.

Like everyone else in the Palin orbit Mercede is aiming for a name and money for herself. She might as well since Bristol continues to tar her.

A girls gotta do what a girls gotta do in this day of everyman and woman for themselves. Bristol jabs and Mercede responds. High school vendetta continues.

But it is Sarah Palin who has made it tacky. She could call a halt to it at any time with some honesty.

Bristol will find God and soak the Fundies as her mother has.

lilly lily
7/5/2011 05:15:53 am

I am tired of this tawdry story. Bristol isn't an interesting girl. She is one of tens of thousands of American teens who tried to trap a guy by getting pregnant.

The royal money road for her, a sad one for many teens.

I'm going to the beach with a good summer read like Fiona Walker. I'll take Tacky with a bit of wit.

In Palin land there is no wit or humor, honor or intelligence. It is all teenaged hormones, high school level meaness and money grubbing.

daisydem
7/5/2011 06:11:24 am

Nice ride on the bus Laura and Sarah. Sarah, I have loved reading your posts on Politicusa over the last 2+ years. Again, thanks to both of you for your insight into all things Palin. (Daisydem: one of the girls on the bus)

LisanTX
7/5/2011 06:27:40 am

Thanks to both of you, Laura and Sarah, for the outstanding writing! I appreciate it.

Here is a new picture of Trig.
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=180720315320762&set=pu.109696302423164&type=1&theater

He looks remarkably like Levi. Could it be that this connection (Trig) to the Palins is a reason for Levi's silence?

I think Trig's resemblance to Levi is the reason that Sarah doesn't parade him around anymore.

curiouser
7/5/2011 06:46:20 am

Brava, Laura and Sarah! You two turned a dismal, twisted topic into an insightful and fun read. It's probably too much to hope that Palin's eventual fall will send shock waves strong enough to force the dog to bite off it's tail and shake up our media's cynical political coverage...but I remain optimistic.

Sarah, your 'Hooter Democracy' article gave me a voice. You have my deepest gratitude and respect.

Chickapee
7/5/2011 09:54:30 am

Website for this image

palindeception.com

* Full-size image - Same sizex larger

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Type: 65KB JPG

This image may be subject to copyright.



Laura here is the family pic from Dec 2007 I spoke of a few days ago. It was on Palin's deception. The blond little boy resembles Tripp and he belongs to Sarah's sister.

Up
7/5/2011 08:32:06 pm

I love these rides on the bus.

The GOP needs to truly embrace diversity or it will be gone. I hope they do it because we need two strong parties.

diane
7/7/2011 12:47:28 am

I wish they would do something for Trig's eyes.
If he is supposed to wear glasses then they should insist that he does.
Is he supposed to be wearing a hearing aid?


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    Laura Novak

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