Laura Novak
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What’s Your Log Line?

10/19/2011

 
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The logline, in Hollywood parlance, is the sentence that tells you exactly what a movie is about. It answers the question “What is it?” The logline should contain irony and create a compelling mental picture of the film. And you should be able to say it while riding an elevator two floors with Steven Spielberg giving you half of his attention.

Two great examples taken from a book on Screenwriting called “Save the Cat” by Blake Snyder, are these:

“A cop comes to L.A. to visit his estranged wife and her office building is taken over by terrorists -- Die Hard.”

“A business man falls in love with a hooker he hires to be his date for the weekend -- Pretty Woman.”

The logline for my novel Finding Clarity is:  “The fur flies when a misfit mom takes on the ruling class at her son’s elite academy in quirky Berkeley, California.” 

So, you’ve got one line, yes, that’s right, one line to paint the the right picture in order to convince Oliver Stone to produce a documentary on Sarah Palin’s fake pregnancy conspiracy. One line with which you can convince the new managing editor of The New York Times to authorize a full investigation for a 7,000-word, front page story using all of the blogs as resources.

Irony. Emotion. One line.

Okay. What is it?


Jennie
10/19/2011 10:00:29 am

A rising political star goes from flat-bellied to fecund in a week, and flies across the country while in labor.

Gryphen link
10/19/2011 10:03:11 am

"Sarah Palin emerges from the wilds of Wasilla with a politically potent pro-life prop, born from a womb not her own, to become the most fascinatingly divisive last minute VP candidate the world has ever known."

Or something like that.

colacarat
10/19/2011 10:09:03 am

The consummate grifter: bat-shit crazy fake Christian feigns pregnancy to hypnotize right-wing supporters, quits job, assassinates opposition, pimps family members, and achieves millionaire status.

What a country.

Laura Novak
10/19/2011 10:11:34 am

You guys are on fire! I love it!

But it's not as easy as you'd think to synthesize this into its "essence"! Is it?

colacarat
10/19/2011 10:27:02 am

Mentally ill, evil, stupid person wins Republican Vice Presidential nomination by faking pregnancy.

Go figure.

Cynthia
10/19/2011 10:54:20 am

Prayer warrior and political novice delivers a special needs baby under surreptitious circumstances only later to have God thwart her plans for national office.

Just_a_Mote
10/19/2011 11:21:08 am

Down syndrome baby, used as a political prop, destroys ex governor of Alaska.

Up
10/19/2011 11:28:01 am

i like Cynthia's.

Since this is for Stone, who seems to revel in conspiracies, I'd say

"Religious extremists conspire to force a former war hero presidential candidate to choose as his running mate a wholesome, fresh-faced beauty queen governor with an outlandish secret."

Ottoline
10/19/2011 11:59:20 am


Hoping to control the United States, Dominionist and corporate demigods aim to win a presidential election via forcing a corn-pone anti-choice Mom (who repeatedly displays her Down Syndrome infant) into the vice-presidential slot, expecting to install her as a puppet figurehead after a timely post-election assasination, while the MSM do nothing to uncover the treacherous secrets of either the demigods or the DS Mom.

But Obama wins anyway!!!! (snort, chortle, hahahahaha, the sounds of glee of your choice, followed by the scary grunting and moans of lifting -- the work of digging ourselves out of the economic collapse caused by the demigods' choice of president last time around, while McCain keeps shouting
"The economy is fundamentally sound!" "Let's stop the campaign to think this over!"
"I'm so proud of my VP, who is the world's foremost energy expert!"
-- and the angry demigods sulk, pout, obfuscate, regroup for another round, and . . . [stay tuned].)

Molly
10/19/2011 12:05:54 pm

molly
10/19/2011 12:08:43 pm

Oops, let me try that again...

"Mentally deranged Governor faked her most recent pregnancy, yet still picked for VP spot; campaign staffers scramble to avert national disaster."

Ottoline
10/19/2011 12:10:19 pm

A better version:

Hoping to rule all, Dominionist and corporate demigods aim to win a presidential election by forcing into the vice-presidential slot a malaprop-spewing, corn-pone, anti-choice Mom (who repeatedly displays her barefoot, sleepy Down Syndrome infant), expecting to use her as a puppet figurehead after a timely post-election presidential assasination, while the MSM do nothing to uncover the treacherous secrets of either the demigods or the DS Mom, and the electorate is stunned into stupefied apathy.

FrostyAK
10/19/2011 12:19:13 pm

Wasilla Grifter - the story of a small time corrupt politician who, with no vetting whatsoever by the national political committee or the MSM, is elevated to the second highest nomination in the country, riding the wave of the biggest political hoax in history.

BicPent
10/19/2011 12:21:21 pm

Here is one way I *wish* the story had gone:

"Intrepid reporter, embedded with the Republican presidential campaign, is appalled to discover explosive secrets of unvetted VP candidate and races to expose the truth before the election."

FrostyAK
10/19/2011 12:31:57 pm

OT - Parnell administration requesting extension to release the rest of the $P emails. They say they can't get it done before February.

I expect they will redact 90% since we found so much information in the first batch.

Diapers and politicians should be changed often, both for the same reason.

colacarat
10/19/2011 12:35:54 pm

Shape-shifter grifter.

How's that?

colacarat
10/19/2011 12:38:41 pm

or....

Fraud...oh, my lawd!

(o.k., I need to stop now.)

Ottoline
10/19/2011 01:57:20 pm

Pseudo-pregnant Palin perps perverted pox on public perception, planning to prevail as president, while princes of profiteering plan pestilential poverty for plain people.

Cherryn
10/19/2011 02:30:35 pm


Mythconception

Inept Politician Pads Abdomen to become VP Pick.

"From Foam to Maturnity in 18 days for Dummys"


AKPetMom
10/19/2011 02:43:54 pm

Popular Alaskan Governor, age 44, gives birth to premature Down Syndrome infant at a small local hospital after traveling 4000 air miles from Dallas, Texas, all while leaking amniotic fluid. Airline staff interviewed noted "there was no apparent sign of pregnancy or distress".

Premature infant and Mother were back at the office 3 days later.

The Governor gives all the credit to her "tight abs", but rumors abound regarding her daughter Bristol being "missing in action" during the months leading to the birth.

Grandma or late life mother? You be the judge.

AKPetMom
10/19/2011 03:03:04 pm

Frequent flyer, Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin, age 44, credits her "tight abs" as being the key to keeping her pregnancy, labor pains, and leaking amniotic fluid "in check" while flying from Dallas Texas via Seattle to Anchorage and then driving to her local hospital to give birth to her premature Down Syndrome infant.

Her husband "First Dude" Todd Palin, a commercial fisherman, explained it to local reporters when he said "We couldn't have a fishpicker born in Texas".

It seems that the Frontier is still breeding some strong people!

AKPetMom
10/19/2011 03:10:01 pm

(Okay, just one more, shorter, and more in keeping with the actual logline theme of fewer words...Thanks for humoring me; this was a really fun diversion after a day of staring at numbers...)

An Alaskan Governor in labor flies from Dallas Texas to give birth to her special needs infant in her hometown hospital because her fisherman husband can't have a "fishpicker" born in Texas!

OzMud link
10/19/2011 03:45:24 pm

God pays woman $40 mil to fake pregnancy to win public support in national election - fakes birth - wins support - loses election - keeps money – what happens to kid? – find out in 7 to 10 seasons.

Polarmax
10/19/2011 05:22:55 pm

A young boy's borrowed Mom uses his delightful innocence to hoodwink the nation to the brink of Dominionism-- but does she act alone?

OzMud link
10/19/2011 06:24:38 pm

Ha! Nice to know I can't follow simple instructions! rofl Somewhere along the line I missed the last half of the last paragraph and thought we were pitching a tv show! hahaha

KMR
10/19/2011 07:01:05 pm

Photos don't lie but Alaskan Half-Term-Ex-Governor Sarah Palin does - about everything - including a fake pregnancy that would take the biggest prize at the home of the odd and unusual - Ripley's Believe it or Not.

suzanne
10/19/2011 07:46:18 pm

LOL! Good stuff here. Brevity really is wit.

B
10/20/2011 12:44:09 am

@Cherryn. Mythconception--Like it!

Another log word: Pregnot.

Tom link
10/20/2011 01:08:22 am

Obscure governor fakes pregnancy in order to secure VP nomination but has to steal an infant to prove a birth. Unknowingly, said infant was the product of a Satanic coven's son of Satan plan. Governor meets match in infant. Think 'Raising Aeizona' meets 'Rosemary's Baby'.

Original Lee
10/20/2011 01:26:01 am

Ruthlessly ambitious former beauty queen almost becomes President but stress of covering up fake pregnancy and prop baby that brought her fame and fortune pushes her mental illness to the fore.

Original Lee
10/20/2011 01:28:54 am

Ruthlessly ambitious former beauty queen goes a bridge too far when she fakes pregnancy and birth of handicapped baby to further her political ambitions.

(Less kind but more accurate.)

Original Lee
10/20/2011 01:30:58 am

I should proof a bit better before I hit send!

Ruthlessly ambitious former beauty queen goes a bridge too far when she fakes pregnancy and birth of handicapped baby to further her bid for President.

Laura Novak
10/20/2011 02:23:33 am

You guys are hysterical. And good! It's not as easy as it looks!

But remember: Oliver Stone is only going up 4 floors. He's got a cell phone in one hand, latte in the other, and an assistant talking in his other ear.

You've got ONE sentence. Make it count!

molly malone
10/20/2011 02:50:48 am

Armed only with their wits and computers, a small group of people take on a popular, charismatic politician who is, in reality, a dangerous psychopath.

Original Lee
10/20/2011 03:31:16 am

molly malone - Love it! I would only change "a small group of people" to something like "an intrepid group of ordinary voters" to make it pop more.

Original Lee
10/20/2011 03:41:33 am

Manchurian Candidate aims to become Potemkin President with the support of a mysterious group of billionaires but proves wackily incompetent at covering up her sordid past.

Indigojane
10/20/2011 04:33:07 am

In a world where responsible reporting has been replaced by partisan entertainment, one woman emerges from the frozen Alaskan tundra to ultimately prove herself an inconsequential political and Christian phony, but not before rallying, yet dividing, the country, leaving failed policies, faked pregnancies, vindictive actions in her wake.

molly malone
10/20/2011 05:08:01 am

@ Original Lee.

I definitely like "an intrepid group of ordinary voters" much better.

Mhurka
10/20/2011 05:46:54 am

After donning a maternity costume, a sitting governor gets up on stage, declares herself pregnant, and gets away with it.

grammy97
10/20/2011 06:10:09 am

"Immaculate Deception: How $arah Palin chose lies."

Banyan
10/20/2011 06:11:04 am

On a deluded Mission from GOD and GOP, Alaskan Governor labors under a misconception, deludes US populace, delivers defeat, is crucified by the Blogosphere, and descends into Lake Lucille.

comeonpeople
10/20/2011 06:17:35 am

Bad Medicine: Doctor and hospital take unspeakable risks with high profile patient...or did they?

Laura Novak
10/20/2011 06:23:31 am

Ohhhh, you guys are good. And I love that Banyan has the story ending under water. Ha! Then there can be sequel to the horror story!

Hard to tell what to include: immaculate deception, wild ride, family, voters, GOP, religious fringe, hospital. But what of the doctor, the husband, the high heels and foam padding?

I'm still working on my log line for this fiasco. It's so hard to synthesize it all into that one key sentence. Irony..imagery...hmmmm.

Banyan
10/20/2011 06:41:11 am



...descends into Lake Lucille which bursts into flames.

Laura Novak
10/20/2011 06:57:43 am

LMAO!!!

Melly
10/20/2011 09:52:19 am

Mansourian candidate, bewigged, reaches political pinnacle and seizes adoration of cultists, seemingly parting the Sea of Pee...only to slide back down to infamy on a slope made slippery by the very amniotic fluid she claims to have leaked in a tale too unfathomable, too scalding, too graphic, and too utterly stupid to ever stop ridiculing.

physicsmom
10/20/2011 11:22:27 am

Everyone is doing a great job. If the goal is to spark a new (excuse me, any) investigation, I like KMR's the best. For submitting the single "if only" logline, Bic Pent gets my kudos and admiration. Oh, I wish!

rf
10/20/2011 12:20:32 pm

GOP presidential nominee, Viet Nam Vet John McCain (PTSD victim) chooses Sarah Palin,(NPD victim) as running mate, and the look at what this combination in the white house would and could do to America.

OzMud link
10/20/2011 12:44:56 pm

Woman bites dog - media looks the other way.

:)

Road Runner
10/20/2011 12:48:57 pm

Sweet little boy with Downs Syndrome is abandoned by ruthless woman politician who faked her pregnancy with him after the boy's usefulness to her career ends.

Natalie
10/20/2011 01:11:15 pm

In 2008 John McCain unleashed a little known Gov of Alaska that faked her way through everything including a pregnancy.

Bobcat Logic
10/20/2011 01:52:37 pm

McCain betrays country to North Vietnamese in the '60s, and, decades later, to Right-Wing Dominionists.

Rationalist
10/20/2011 02:31:57 pm

ottoline - loving the loads of lovely alliteration!

indigojane - you sound just like don lafontaine, r.i.p.

What's so hard about this is that there are so MANY parts to this story, as Laura pointed out. Which one is the one that will get, as they say, the most "butts in seats?" (or eyeballs on pages)

Examples from a website I was just reading:

"After a series of grisly shark attacks, a sheriff struggles to protect his small beach community against the bloodthirsty monster, in spite of the greedy chamber of commerce."

"In a future where criminals are arrested before the crime occurs, a despondent cop struggles on the lam to prove his innocence for a murder he has not yet committed."

The challenge to this is that we don't know the outcome yet. Does Sarah Palin succeed in keeping the truth of her fake pregnancy from the world at large or does the truth eventually come out? Does she fade into oblivion or does she continue to force her way into the national discourse?

So...a logline consists of protagonist, goal, antagonist.

I just don't want Sarah Palin to be the protagonist. I want *us* to be the protagonists!

And I love the "intrepid group" idea.

So let's see:

Does an intrepid group of ordinary voters - who know each other only by code names - have what it takes to defy an indifferent media to expose the biggest political hoax of our time?

Cherryn
10/20/2011 02:58:07 pm

I never realized how difficult something that sounds so easy can be, but you guys really have me laughing.

Reminds me of a writing class where we had a "Compose a haiku describing the aroma of fresh brewed coffee" exercise.

curiouser
10/20/2011 04:52:15 pm

Oliver Stone, snubbed by the GOP VP candidate on the set of SNL, joins a small ragtag group of pajama-clad bloggers and a few courageous journalists who are seeking to unravel the media and political conspiracy to end democracy in America as the adulterous GOP Presidential nominee is blackmailed by the religious right and forced to cynically choose a pretty, though incompetent and mentally unbalanced running mate with an explosive secret that could take them all down.

Ivyfree
10/21/2011 12:56:57 am

"Deceptive politician schemes to win greater power to promote her religious agenda by using a special needs baby she falsely claims is hers."

elizabeth
10/21/2011 01:10:11 am

Small-town attractive Alaskan housewife makes meteoric rise in Alaska politics through backstabbing and deceit and is then thrust into National spotlight as a completely unqualified VP candidate in outrageously specious move by desperate presidential candidate, only to find herself facing unbearable scrutiny from outraged pajama-clad bloggers as it becomes increasingly obvious that she is a complete fraud with a dark secret that when finally exposed will reveal that she pulled off the greatest hoax in the history of American politics.

Rick
10/21/2011 02:17:46 am

Mentally ill, basketball playing, witch doctor hunting, hockey mothering, beauty queen and flautist Sarah "Barracuda" suddenly finds herself the Governor of Alaska when Frank "The Bank" loses touch with reality and his constituents, leading to hilarity and disbelief when trying to hide a dark secret, she fakes a six week pregnancy and finds that serendipitously it actually increases her cred with brainless religious zealots who send her all their money.

Laura Novak link
10/21/2011 05:44:57 am

I love the work you guys are doing. Especially when you get all mavericky and break the rules and write really LONG log lines that will go on LONG after Mr. Spielberg has left the elevator.

There's so much crazy to this story, how can anyone tell what to include or leave out?

That Jaws log line is a perfect pitch isn't it? Thanks for including it.

Anyway, I'm still chuckling about these. You are all very funny!

Rick
10/27/2011 03:28:52 pm

This was too much fun. Had to try one more.

Cookie Palin plays governor, then takes world's biggest approval rating down into the sewer with one misstep after another.

or The X-rated version

Bored housewife grabs Republican Party by the balls, resulting orgasm drains their brains of any logic.

ortho walkfit link
7/10/2013 04:45:05 pm

Thanks for the answer. I heard about the word, 'Log line' in most film news and was little confused about the actual meaning. I think you have cleared all my doubts and provided a good explanation. Keep writing such informative articles.


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    Laura Novak

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